it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.