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She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
she was so not down for the gang bang
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
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