I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell