Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
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It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.