You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
You pole danced in your parka.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!