She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.