my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.