He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section