The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
home. puking in laundry basket.