You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
We had to coat check the pizza.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.