I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.