Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New York (212)

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  (212): View more from New York

  Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK

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  (212): Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK http://tfl.nu/7q0x
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  No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.

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  (212): No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often. http://tfl.nu/bjtx
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  that's an acceptable place to lick

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  (212): that's an acceptable place to lick http://tfl.nu/6rie
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  I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.

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  (212): I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet. http://tfl.nu/8wa0
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  He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode

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  (212): He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode http://tfl.nu/pfoq
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  Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"

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  (212): Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you" http://tfl.nu/ok3w
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  Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?

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  (212): Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes? http://tfl.nu/3emh
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  They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.

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  (212): They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning. http://tfl.nu/4eyl
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  I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..

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  (212): I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York.. http://tfl.nu/qpq0
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  That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."

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  (212): That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood." http://tfl.nu/okr0
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  You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.

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  (212): You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band. http://tfl.nu/ldj0
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  Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods

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  (212): Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods http://tfl.nu/urut
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  Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.

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  (212): Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals. http://tfl.nu/0i6j
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  When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.

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  (212): When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too. http://tfl.nu/4mqk
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  you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window

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  i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there

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  (212): you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window (212): i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there http://tfl.nu/q2cr
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