since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s