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is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
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