Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.