Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night