Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I can't put those talents on a resume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore