I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.