You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
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we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
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well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.