So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.