EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.