I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl