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I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i came on her dog
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
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