Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?