just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
zippers are such a cool invention
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?