One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
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I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
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I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.