My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
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So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
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My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome