I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre