Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
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If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
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We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?