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He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
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