Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Oregon (541)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids. http://tfl.nu/e2e0
  Replies (12) Good night (2006) Bad night (465) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch http://tfl.nu/6s8v
  Replies (12) Good night (2579) Bad night (434) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning. http://tfl.nu/4pom
  Replies (16) Good night (2344) Bad night (605) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more http://tfl.nu/azy4
  Replies (9) Good night (2786) Bad night (379) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out. http://tfl.nu/wy42
  Replies (11) Good night (510) Bad night (877)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers. http://tfl.nu/28i2
  Replies (22) Good night (917) Bad night (1523) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house? http://tfl.nu/uvha
  Replies (12) Good night (552) Bad night (1822)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work. http://tfl.nu/fnwr
  Replies (4) Good night (1364) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now. http://tfl.nu/mv3i
  Replies (2) Good night (1237) Bad night (431) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high. http://tfl.nu/kh91
  Replies (6) Good night (1367) Bad night (402) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either. http://tfl.nu/a1p0
  Replies (9) Good night (1683) Bad night (427) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.

  (1-541): View more from Oregon

  You're welcome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes. (1-541): You're welcome. http://tfl.nu/axhz
  Replies (6) Good night (1913) Bad night (316) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts. http://tfl.nu/e6qn
  Replies (5) Good night (1865) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall. http://tfl.nu/64r1
  Replies (7) Good night (3852) Bad night (367) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars. http://tfl.nu/cv6a
  Replies (8) Good night (1821) Bad night (317) Order T-Shirt