Texts From Last Night

Last Night in New York (516)

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  I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book

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  (516): I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book http://tfl.nu/reox
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  VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR

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  (516): VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR http://tfl.nu/4b6v
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  I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line

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  (516): I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line http://tfl.nu/kwv6
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  drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries

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  (516): drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries http://tfl.nu/4gv5
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  Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs

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  (516): Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs http://tfl.nu/6o6j
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  Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.

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  (516): Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back. http://tfl.nu/h2g1
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  I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card

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  (516): I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card http://tfl.nu/zhem
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  You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.

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  (516): You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food. http://tfl.nu/5019
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  Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar

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  (516): Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar http://tfl.nu/xg4s
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  drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me

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  he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york

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  (516): drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me (516): he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york http://tfl.nu/5sdf
  Replies (3) Good night (1952) Bad night (523)
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  well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks

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  (516): well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks http://tfl.nu/b8ud
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  Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS

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  (516): Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS http://tfl.nu/0ql8
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  I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos

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  (516): I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos http://tfl.nu/9ruo
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  i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD

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  (516): i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD http://tfl.nu/cfey
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  i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.

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  (516): i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend. http://tfl.nu/ygax
  Replies (3) Good night (853) Bad night (1523) Order T-Shirt