I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
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you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
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He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.