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..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
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