I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Drunk walkin through police station. America
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.