Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers