So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt