i may or may not be watching the land before time
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
You can't special order awesome
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.