I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.