I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
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First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
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He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers