That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup