I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me