He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
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Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
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She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot