My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down