omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
they're staring at me
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
im drinking this country out of the recession.
id be glad to
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.