someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
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I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
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I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time