Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere