In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer