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how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
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