Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I can tuck mytits in my pants
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...