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just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
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