How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
When did we convert life to cartoon?