Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Tennessee (423)

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  He played with my vagina like it was a turntable

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  (423): He played with my vagina like it was a turntable http://tfl.nu/xc9s
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  I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.

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  (423): I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover. http://tfl.nu/w5jl
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  you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell

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  thats the international knock for joint time

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  (423): you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell (901): thats the international knock for joint time http://tfl.nu/xbry
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  Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.

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  (423): Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now. http://tfl.nu/w5j3
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  gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it

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  (423): gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it http://tfl.nu/v9kx
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  come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again

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  (423): come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again http://tfl.nu/f993
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  drunk tastebuds have low standards.

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  (423): drunk tastebuds have low standards. http://tfl.nu/mx1k
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  I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.

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  (423): I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him. http://tfl.nu/dili
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  i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.

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  (423): i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago. http://tfl.nu/sxj3
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  I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help

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  (423): I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help http://tfl.nu/q44r
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  pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.

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  (423): pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards. http://tfl.nu/9pdc
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  We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.

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  (423): We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands. http://tfl.nu/9yq1
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  2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place

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  (423) 2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place http://tfl.nu/hlr5
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  There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.

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  (423): There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself. http://tfl.nu/9xij
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  By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.

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  (423): By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time. http://tfl.nu/7ckj
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